


smirks and smiles

by regal_roni



Category: NCIS
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Reader-Insert, slightly nsfw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:15:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27567358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/regal_roni/pseuds/regal_roni
Summary: There's a kiss, but it's fine because she's straight and you're totally fine. Totally A-okay. Totally not replaying the memory over and over and over again in your head.It's fine.
Relationships: Jacqueline "Jack" Sloane/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 40





	smirks and smiles

**Author's Note:**

> She's back and she's worse than ever. 
> 
> I debated HEAVILY about not posting this. It's kind of similar to a fic I've posted in the past. But you should all thank strongsassysexysloane for telling me to get my head out my ass and just suck it up and post it (she didn’t say that she was really nice and was saying lovely things about my writing - I just like being dramatic). _Anyway_ , as always, feedback is welcome and appreciated :) Enjoy!

Nick and Ellie are already in a booth squabbling when you pull up in your car. You can see Ellie through the window, hand wagging frustratedly between the menu and Nick, who's got a frustrated look on his own face. 

“A chocolate muffin does not count as breakfast!” Nick groans as you enter the diner. You stifle a laugh. Honestly, the number of arguments they had over food was ridiculous.

“You literally ordered a fried egg, that’s not a proper breakfast either!”

“It’s protein, which is important, and I told you I ate something before I left this morning.”

Ellie rolls her eyes, ready to snap back. You decide it’s about time to step in before one of them bites the others head off. “Morning guys.” You smile, sliding in opposite them. 

“Y/N,” Nick cheers, “can you please tell Ellie that a chocolate muffin isn’t a suitable breakfast choice.” 

Sheepishly you look to Ellie, “Sorry Els, it isn’t.”

She huffs, “Fine I’ll order pancakes as well, happy?” She looks to Nick who looks ready to argue back, more than likely about how that’s way too much sugar, but you glare at him before he can say anything, and his mouth clicks shut. 

Elaine comes by to take your order, and you place your usual - a coffee, and the scrambled eggs meal. Ellie adds her pancakes which earns a chuckle from the waitress. 

You guys fall into easy conversation, groaning about work, discussing your plans for next weekend, and laughing at how you all spent Sunday recovering from your disgusting hangovers. 

“How was Jack? I feel like she’s one of those lucky ones who rarely gets bad hangovers.” Ellie asks, just as Elaine is returning with all your food. 

Your whole-body tenses at the mention of Jack. You’d been trying to avoid thinking about her since you left the bar on Saturday (meaning all you’d done was think about her...and her soft lips and the way her hand her gripped your neck and the soft mews that you’d pulled from her mouth-)

“Y/N? Are you okay? You’re looking a little flushed?” 

You clear your throat and force a smile, “Yeah, I'm good. This looks absolutely delicious.” Probably a little too enthusiastic for a meal you have at least once a week, but the others don’t seem to mind, just shrug, and dig into their own food. 

Ellie takes a couple of bites before she repeats her question from before, “So, Jack, how was she?” 

You frown, surprised the question was actually directed at you. “I-I don’t know. I left the bar before you guys did.” Ellie and Nick both have matching smirks on their faces that make you instantly uneasy. “What?”

“Oh, come on Y/N.” Nick winks playfully, “Kasie told us what she walked in on.” 

All the colour drains from your face, dread settling in your stomach as images of Saturday night come flooding back (like they ever left). Jack in the bathroom with her flirty drunken smile, you and her throwing back comments and quips as you get closer and closer until she kisses you, and then it’s all lips and teeth, Jack’s hand threading through your hair as you tug her closer. Your hands stroking her sides, the way she’d giggled against your lips, shooting you a glare when you dared to do it again and then shoving you back against the wall with hunger shining in her eyes before she practically devoured you.

And then Kasie had entered and the two of you had sprung apart. You didn’t think she’d have told anyone yet. You were going to catch her this morning and swear her to secrecy. Explain that the two of you were just drunk because Jack didn’t even like women, she was straight. She wasn’t interested in you like that. She liked men, like the man who’d been flirting with her at the bar less than fifteen minutes later.

“That was nothing, we were drunk.” You mumble, burying your head in your food and trying to ignore the rapid beating of your heart. 

“I don’t know about you, but I don’t tend to make out with my friends while drunk.” Ellie teases, and you feel something snap in your chest. 

“Well apparently Jack does, so can we just drop it!” Ellie and Nick both stare at you in shock. Even Elaine was looking at you from the counter with barely hidden concern. You swallow roughly, regaining your composure. “I’m not hungry anyway, I’ll see you guys at the office.” 

“Wait, Y/N!” Ellie protests, but you’re already sliding out of the booth and dropping some bills onto the table.

\----

You get why they were so gleeful. Both of them had known about your little crush for a while now (after another night with too much alcohol where you decided to spill your best-hidden secret, and really maybe you should stop drinking so much). They thought this was a good sign, but you knew better.

Jack had never expressed even the slightest bit of interest in women. You have known her for over a year now and she’d only ever dated men, only ever expressed romantic interest for men, and had never so much as looked at a woman twice. In your book that was a pretty good indication that someone was straight. 

Ellie was insistent she felt the same and had been for months. “Y/N, come on how do you not see this! She literally orbits around you; she’s constantly sending you looks and touching you.”

You’d responded with something about how Jack was just a very affectionate person and Ellie had instantly rebutted with how it was with you more than anyone else. 

And maybe that was true, but it still didn’t mean she was interested in you. She’d never even displayed a hint of that until Saturday when you were both one too many drinks in. Jack had probably just kissed you for some drunken experiment, wanted to see what it was like to kiss a woman. And obviously, it wasn’t that great, despite her mews and moans, because then she’d been flirting with that guy at the bar and you’d left before she could return. Tired, and with tears burning your eyes from a mix of frustration and sadness.

You don’t see her until the afternoon when she comes down to present her findings to the team. Even though you try to resist and remain focused on the briefing, your eyes constantly find their way to her. She acts completely normal. Banters with Gibbs, complements Ellie’s new shirt, even smiles her usual way at you when she eventually looks in your direction. It’s like nothing has happened, and you guess to her maybe it hasn't. It was a drunken mistake, a mistake that didn’t need mentioning because it didn’t mean anything.

You push away everything you’re feeling and focus on the case. You’d never minded doing the tasks people found boring, sifting through paperwork, looking through records, it was all quite calming. And with a case with multiple victims, there was a lot to go through. 

You’re so focused on your work you barely notice Tim and Ellie leave for the day, and then about an hour later Nick too. Actually, the first time you realise how late it is is when Gibbs slaps down a container of chow mein from the local Chinese restaurant in front of you. “Eat.” He demands, before moving to sit at his desk with his own box of food. 

You sit up properly as your back cracks in protest. Definitely, a sign you’d been sitting still for too long. The smell of food has your stomach rumbling and you finally notice the time. 20:18. “Thanks.” You mumble, shooting an awkward smile at Gibbs who’s definitely assessing you. “Why-” Your words lodge in your throat when you hear the familiar clacking of heels against the landing. You don’t even need to turn your head to know it’s her. Instead, you bury your head in your noodles and hope she says a short goodbye and leaves. 

“Did you get it?” She grins, excitedly making her way into the bullpen. Gibbs smirks and holds up another take out container you hadn’t noticed before. Her smile widens even more, and she grabs Ellie’s chair, dragging it along behind her and parking it in front of Gibbs’ desk before accepting the outstretched food and flopping down into the chair with a dramatic sigh. “I’ve been thinking about this all day.” 

“I only mentioned getting it less than an hour ago.”

Jack shrugs, her lips twisting into a smirk, “Great minds.” 

You squirm slightly in your chair, watching their easy banter and wondering if the rumours about her and Gibbs were true. They’d been the top gossip conversation when you’d joined Gibbs’ team, but over the year the rumours had faded. You never got it personally, but sometimes they’d look at each other a certain way and you did wonder…

“So, what are the two of you still doing here?” Jack asks, looking between you and Gibbs as she tucks into her food. 

You shrug, “Paperwork.” It’s not really an answer when most aspects of your job include paperwork, but Jack just nods and turns to Gibbs with an expectant smile. Gibbs’ eyes narrow as he looks at her, then you, and then back to her. 

“Could ask you the same question, Jack.” 

Her smile turns strained, but she tries to play it off with a shrug. “Evals don’t write themselves.” They’re both locked in a staring match, and suddenly you feel you’re intruding on something that you really don’t want to understand. You quietly save and switch off your computer and tidy away the work on your desk, it takes a couple of minutes but somehow, they’re still stubbornly staring at each other when you turn back around.

“Right, well I’m going to head home. Thanks for the food.” 

Jack turns to you with a smile, completely unfazed “Night, Y/N. See you tomorrow.” 

You shrug on your bag and drop the empty take out box into the bin before looking back to them. Gibbs is still watching Jack, who’s smiling pleasantly at you. You frown, “Right...well night.” 

With a sigh you head to the lift, and just as the elevator doors are closing you here Jack’s irritated voice. “You can stare all you want cowboy! It’s not going to make me do anything.”

\----

“Have you spoken to Jack about last Saturday yet?” Ellie asks as you both walk through the corridors of headquarters.

Your feet halt in their tracks and you hurriedly look around to make sure nobody can hear the two of you. “Seriously?”

Ellie shrugs, and arches her brows in question, “So, have you?” 

“I thought we agreed we weren’t talking about this again.” 

“We didn’t talk about it the first time; you ran out of the diner faster than Jimmy when Gibbs creeps up on him.” 

You roll your eyes, “I didn’t run.” 

“Okay,” Ellie chuckles. 

“Look there’s nothing to talk about.” You sigh, “It happened, we were both drunk. Jack seems fine, so why should I bring it up?” Well, you assumed she was fine. You’d been doing what you could to avoid her all week which was surprisingly easy as she only seemed to appear when it was related to work and that was a good enough distraction in itself. The only time you would have properly been forced to interact with her was when Ellie suggested going out for dinner after work in an obvious attempt to get the two of you together. Jack had agreed and so you had quickly declined. 

“Jack’s not fine and neither are you. You’re both just too stubborn to admit it and would rather pretend what happened wasn’t important.”

“It wasn’t.” 

“Right.” She rolls her eyes, and stops walking, head pointing to an open office door. “Oh, look we've reached our destination.”

“We’ve what?” You frown, and your eyes widen in horror when you realise that Ellie has led you right to Jack’s office. “Wait-”

“Hey, Jack.” Ellie walks in, dragging you along behind her with a sharp tug. “Y/N was looking for you- “

“No, I wasn’t.”

“-she wants to talk to you. So, see you later. Bye,” Ellie shoves you further into the room before quickly shutting the door behind her. 

You stare at it in shock, thinking over all the ways you were going to make her pay for this as Jack rises from her office chair. “That wasn’t weird at all.” Swallowing roughly, you turn around to face her. She looks from the door to you with a bemused smile, “Care to explain?” 

“That would require me understanding Ellie’s brain, and I’m not the psychologist.” 

Jack chuckles, and tilts on her feet, “Well, you’re here now and I’ve just made coffee. Do you want to join me?” She signals to the couch, and you look between the door, her, and the couch debating your options. Coffee did sound nice; you hadn’t had any since lunch.

“Sure,” You nod. Her face breaks into a wide smile and she does a small dance that has a smile instantly tugging at your lips. You’d missed her.

“Yay! Okay, make yourself comfortable and I’ll bring you a mug.” 

You situate yourself on the couch and flick your shoes off tucking them under the coffee table as Jack moves over to her cabinet where the coffee machine and mugs sit. Your fingers tap on your knees as nerves wrack through you. This was the first time you’d been completely alone with her since Saturday.

She looks to your hands as she comes over, frowning slightly, but she doesn’t question it and instead passes you the mug which you happily accept, grateful to have something to fill your hands with, “Here you go.”

“Thanks,” You smile as Jack moves to sit next to you, leaving a larger gap between the two of you than normal. 

“How’s the case going?” She asks and takes a sip of her drink. 

“Slow.” You sigh. “Tim and Nick are back out talking to neighbours in hopes of finding someone who knows something, and I should be interviewing Smith’s colleague but the man cancelled for the second time so I’m going to drop by tomorrow so he can’t postpone again.”

Jack hums, “Walter Furney by any chance?”

You roll your eyes and chuckle, “Yep. Safe to assume he knows something at the very least.”

“Definitely. I looked into him, good record but almost too good...” She frowns, and your lips twitch.

“You’re starting to sound like Gibbs.” 

She groans, and shoots you a playful glare, “God, maybe it’s time to get a new job then.” You laugh, and she tilts her head slightly “or maybe I just need a holiday.”

“Yeah, like that’s going to happen anytime soon.” You honestly couldn’t remember the last time anyone on the team had a holiday. The closest you got was last Christmas when you visited your family and you’re almost certain that didn’t count. 

She sighs, “True. I’ll just have to settle with alcohol and good nights out then.”

You grimace, “Yeah, I don’t have that option anymore. I’ve decided it’s probably best to swear off alcohol for a while. I’m discovering we aren’t the best mix. Guess I’ll have to find a new hobby.” 

Jack stills, her small smile gone. The air fills with a sudden tension and you want to backpedal solely to relieve it but doing that would only lead you into having the conversation that you were sure neither of you wanted to have. You down the last dregs of your drink instead, “Anyway I should probably go get some paperwork done so I can leave at a reasonable time tonight.” 

You avoid looking in her direction as you place your mug on the coffee table and put your shoes back on. It’s not until you stand up that you do, and find her chewing on her lip, deep in thought. You gulp.

“I’ll see you later then, yeah?”

That prompts her into action, she places her mug down and smiles although it doesn’t even come close to meeting her eyes, “Yes, of course. I should probably get back to work anyway.” 

You nod and make your way to the door and just as you're about to touch the door handle Jack suddenly shoots up from the couch, “Actually, wait.”

You suppress your sigh, _so close_ , and turn back around to face her. 

“We should talk about Saturday.” 

You shake your head, “Jack-” 

“Please.” She cuts you off and moves closer, wringing her hands. “I think this is something we need to discuss.” 

“Why now?” You scoff, “It’s been nearly a week. You’re fine. I’m fine. We were both drunk. Nothing else needs to be said.”

Her eyes fill with hurt, but she takes another step forward. Now within reach, and you have to resist the urge to step away. She blows out a breath, “What if I’m not fine?” 

Tears build behind your eyes and you quickly look away. Your voice is barely above a whisper when you speak, “You kissed me, Jack. I get it, you’re probably uncomfortable around me now, but I’ve been giving you space I don’t know what else I can do.” 

“You haven’t been ‘giving me space’ you’ve been avoiding me.” 

“Same difference.” You mutter, and even though you still aren’t looking at her you can practically hear her eye roll. 

“See so you are obviously not okay either.” She steps into your personal space and reaches for your hand. Her perfume brings you right back to that night and when her fingers brush against yours your breath catches, and you squeeze your eyes shut. “I need you to talk to me because I’ve been playing everything over in my head all week, running myself in circles trying to work out what you’re feeling. This may be hard to believe but I don’t actually possess mind-reading abilities.” Your lips twitch slightly but you don’t say anything. Jack takes a breath and continues,

“I’ll start. When I got back to the table and Ellie told me you’d left I thought you regretted our kiss. I was hurt and convinced I’d messed everything up between us. I ended up at Gibbs’ house with a bottle of whiskey and talking, well more like ranting, at him.” 

“You went to Gibbs?” 

She groans, “I know, not my best decision, but Grace is on holiday and I needed to talk to someone. He was about as much help as you’d expect.” You chuckle, and Jack’s eyes sparkle with humour. “ _Anyway,_ I didn’t know what to say so I did what I do best, push it all away, put on a brave face and pretend everything is fine. I could tell you were upset, and I should have tried to talk to you sooner, but I was scared,” She squeezes your fingers, her eyes completely earnest, “I am sorry.” 

You step back, breaking the little contact between you. You try to subtly blink away the tears in your eyes but when you look at Jack her face is so full of concern, you’re pretty sure you were unsuccessful. “It was just a kiss, right? We were both drunk. It doesn’t need to mean anything.” 

“But it did mean something to me, and I hoped that maybe it did to you as well.”

“What?” You frown, “but you’re straight.”

Jack’s eyes nearly bulge out of her head, “Where did you get that idea from? I’ve dated plenty of women. I was with Izzy for eight months back in San Diego.” 

“What? No. Everyone you’ve dated has been a man.” 

“What do you mean out of the five dates I’ve been on over the course of the year? Yes, they all happened to be men, but that doesn’t mean I don’t date women too.” 

“Oh...but at the bar, you were flirting with that man. I thought the kiss didn’t mean anything to you.” 

“What man?” Jack frowns but understanding quickly washes over her face, “John? He’s an old friend, we were catching up because we hadn’t seen each other for over ten years, and he offered to buy me a drink. I didn’t even think about what that must have looked like.” 

“Oh. Then why did you kiss me?” You ask hesitantly as you push down all the hope simmering in your chest.

“Because I wanted too, because I’ve wanted too for a while now, and because I thought that you wanted to kiss me too.” 

“I-I did.” You swallow roughly, “And I do.” 

She smiles softly, “Good because I happen to really like you, and it would really suck if I never got the opportunity to kiss you again.” 

“Yeah?” you bite your lip to stop the wide grin threatening to take over your face.  
Jack hums. Her hand reaches out and brushes your cheek and your eyes close at the contact. You lean into her soft touch, smiling as her thumb brushes over your lips. When you open your eyes again Jack’s watching you so closely, her eyes fall to your lips and your tongue swipes out to moisture them. 

“All I’ve done this week is play that kiss over and over in my head.” You whisper as you lean in. Jack’s eyes close, her breath blowing against your lips as your nose brushes against hers. 

“Me too.” She sighs and closes the last bit of distance between you. The kiss starts off slow. Small pecks, but it’s not long before your hands find their way to Jack’s hair, and hers leave your face to grip at your waist and in turn, the kiss turns from soft to hurried and hot. Jack’s fingers slide under your shirt and tickle at your sides. 

“Jack,” You whine, squirming in protest. She smirks against your lips.

“Payback.” 

You pull back when she repeats the action. “Can you save payback for later? I have to go back to work in a minute and I’d very much like to keep kissing you until then.” 

Jack’s smirk is predatory, “Later, hmm?” She pulls you back into her and greats your mouth with hungry kisses that have you weak in the knees. You nod not having enough brain power to form any words. Her hand wonders from your waist and strokes up your front stopping once it reaches your breast. Her mouth detaches from yours and she presses kisses along your jaw as she makes her way to your ear. 

“There’s going to be so much payback.” Her hot breath whispers at the same time she cups your breast over your shirt. 

Your whole body is on fire and you’re embarrassed about the strangled noise that escapes your throat. Jack chuckles again, but you cut it off as you grab her chin and bring her mouth right back to yours. 

When the two of you eventually separate, you’re both looking a little dishevelled. You have to stop by the bathroom before heading back to the bullpen to correct your appearance. Ellie’s practically preening and you want to be mad at her, but you can’t be when your lips are still tingling, and your body is on fire in anticipation for tonight. 

Instead, you return to your work, and hey, if you’re a little distracted for the rest of the day nobody mentions it.


End file.
